Life is a big never ending marathon. Whether we are a great marathoner like Paula Jane Radcliffe Or a common man/woman, within ourselves, we are nothing short of the trophy wining marathoners. The training begins early, as sperms it is a marathon to be the 1st one to hit the bull’s eye. And then, the ordeal begins. As kids, the run to grab that seat in the best school, the race against alarm clock, behind school bus, behind marks, against mothers the day results arrive. The almost futile chase for that 1st crush, the best college, the best subjects, marks, that plush job, promotion, (not to miss the run away from that bad boss and that overfriendly slimy colleague), we just keep running!
Then comes a different marathon of life altogether, the running behind that man of our dreams, his mother’s expectations, his family, his mood swings, his likes and dislikes, his attention, his love, his affection, your own family’s expectations, and then comes kids and their marathon becomes yours.
But if we sit back and think, is it worth it? All through our lives, we try to make everyone happy, caring for the smallest of things, weaving hopes of reciprocation, the “happy ever after” life, that never happens. At every milestone we push our likings behind, to make others happy, trying to make their happiness our own. Thinking, one day things will change. They never do. How can we expect happiness when we spoil the very foundation of it by suppressing our desires? Who do we sacrifice our dreams, our opinions, our preferences, our moods for? Do these relationships really care? Almost all relationships in life are thankless. Till the time you run for them, they will cheer you like cheerleaders, to do more for them. The day you choose your own path which differs from theirs, the cheering turns into a cacophony.
The question then is, when we know that almost all relations are thankless, why do we run after them? Why do we adopt their choices as ours? Man is a social animal, and as per our great Mr. Maslow, affiliation needs drive us towards this marathon. Who doesn’t want to be loved, cared for, appreciated, trusted and supported? And we run after these throughout our lives, trying to make everyone happy and expecting happiness in return. If only we take things a bit easy and realize that happiness lies within us, not in any relationship, and that expectations should be limited to exceptions, life will be much smoother and maybe the marathon might just then be a jog, one would enjoy. True, man is a social animal, but it’s the man who builds the society and not the other way round. So, man/woman comes first, not society. Happiness lies within us, as we are the only permanent thing we have…
Sounds good…and I am writing this blog coz I am pissed off with my husband’s mood swings. But the moment he will take me in his arms and weave dreams of a beautiful life together, I will jump to run after his dreams and you all will say “practice what you preach”!