Darjeeling – Down memory lane (Part 1)

Darjeeling undoubtedly has been my best trip ever for two reasons. First, it was my first trip with Mr. Hubby so thinking of it reminds me of all the lovy dovy stuff we were enjoying at that time. Secondly, I have to admit, I haven’t been to another place so laidback & relaxing as Darjeeling. Just like the movie “Barfi”, everything happens at its own sweet pace. It’s great to see a place where people still love to relish the small, simple joys of life, a welcome change for us from the metros, where everyone is running a rat race.

Being pakke ghumakkad (travel freaks), hubby and I are always ready to pack our bags & set out without a notice. However, surprisingly, Darjeeling has been our most planned trip, planned 3 months in advance. 

It was the first time anybody from our families was heading out to the North East & I still remember the concern in my father in law’s voice when he used to call us daily & suggest numerous precautions everyday. But I have to admit, from the moment we landed at Bagdogra airport, there was a not even a single moment when I felt unsafe. The warmth of the people is still afresh in my mind and had it not been for our hectic schedules, once a year Darjeeling darshan would definitely have been on my itinerary.

Day1

The idea of travelling to Darjeeling in the month of July was received with much resistance by family and friends. However, passion needs no bounds. So, on the rainy morning of July 1, 2009, we left home for airport, hoping the rain God would have mercy & not cancel the flight. Just like our cute little destination, the aircraft too was small and cute with only a handful of passengers (mostly honeymooners & families) bound for Bagdogra. Though rain God had mercy, the fear of bad weather kept us anxious throughout the 2 hour flight. I still remember an elderly uncle who had a heated argument with the cabin crew as he was being asked not to move or use the washroom as the weather was bad.  Just too bad for the poor guy, I thought. The frequent chanting of bad weather by the flight stewardess made me somewhat scared as this was my 1^st flight ever. My wicked mind remembered all the plane crash stories I have ever read in newspapers & I was fretting. Mr. Hubby tried his level best to calm me down, trying to divert my mind.

Finally our flight landed at the Bagdogra airport. What a transition – from the gargantuan runway of Delhi airport to the small runway of Bagdogra airport, where one plane landed at a time & quickly made way for the ones about to land. Some things never change no matter wherever you go & cabbies were over enthusiastic to spot tourists. But he didn’t know with us he was inviting agents of decibel torture! As if we had an overdose of laughing gas, hubby & I laughed nonstop during the drive from Bagdogra to Darjeeling. The cabbie kept looking back, perhaps scared if we were insane, as he still had to be paid!

Our hotel was at a certain height from the main road. However, the cabbie, bugged by our bursts of laughter decided he’s had it enough. He dropped us abruptly on the main road & said the resort was just 10 steps up. Before I could look back at him to tell him it seemed more than 50 steps, he was gone! Price paid for our paagalpanti! Hehe …like mules, hubby & I dragged ourselves up the hill till the bellboy spotted us & came to our rescue!

After attacking the room service menu & taking some rest, we set out for a long romantic evening walk. The place had an old world charm like I had seen in Kasauli. The antique architecture and relaxed environment stole my heart. Coffee & muffin at the famous Gelenery’s further ehanced my spirits. Exhausted by the travel & the climb up to the resort (yes, we had to do it every time we went out for a walk), we dozed off much before dinnertime…

Read about Day II of the trip here...

Pic courtesy:Google Search

Pic courtesy:Google Search

The forgiven...

Today, me wonderzzzz about forgiveness…

As a kid, forgiveness to me was about dancing behind mom whenever I did something wrong. She wouldn’t shout or spank. She would just give a foul stare & stop talking to me. So whenever I got that look, I knew I had it from her. As I grew up, the mistakes reduced but her modus operandi didn’t change. I too made a discovery. When asking for forgiveness, the way to the heart is through the stomach. So whenever I had to ask forgiveness, I would stand with an “I am innocent” look with her favorite cup of chai in hand. Now that she is no more, I can’t even ask her why the “royal ignore torture” policy gave her more satisfaction than spanking.

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In school, forgiveness was about crocodile tears, coz that was the only way one could escape a slap from the teacher. Donno why, teachers of my times felt the child was forgiven only after they fulfilled their quota of punishments. Thankfully for me, I was mostly in good books but I can recall the faces of children when teachers summon their parents to school.

College was a step ahead. There was no room for forgiveness. Since teachers could make students dance to tune of the “mandatory attendance” factor, there was no room for forgiveness. I still remember that in my final year of college, my friend & I were punished for being 5min late for the lecture. (Actually, it was more than that…we had dared to giggle looking at the professor & he thought we were making fun of him!). He made us stand outside the class & when fachchas passed by, we felt like criminals facing media persons.

Then came corporate life & the mantra was “to err is to lose out”. There was cut throat competition and rivals waited for that one error from u that would make their day. No wonder the seeds of six sigma were sown at that time, so that one realizes the importance of being error free.

With friends, life is simple, they forgive or they are forgotten!

In relationships, forgiveness is something every girl likes to give & every guy has to ask for, no matter who made the mistake. But it irritates me when I see most wives making their husbands dance around for real petty things. As for me, Mr. Hubby happens to be my mother reloaded. Same silence more extended. And it’s back to childhood for me, as I dance around with his favorite dish in my hands & “I am innocent” look. Just that it takes longer for my Kaikeyi to come out of the kope bhawan & I wait & wait.

Well, the purpose of me sharing all these experiences is not to bore my readers. I wonder why is making mistakes so easy & asking forgiveness so tough? Actually it’s the interim phase that’s more frustating, when we wait for the verdict, just like a cricketer awaits decision from the third umpire. Half of the world’s issues remain unresolved because it’s a pain to ask forgiveness. Since childhood, whenever I have wanted forgiveness, I have prayed to God to simplify the procedure a bit. 

I thought & thought. From banners one could wear on head to a light system like the ones third umpires use to give their verdict; from spokespersons to God doing the job on our behalf, I had the wildest of wild ideas, anything that would spare me the torture of being ignored, spanked, scolded or made feel miserable.  I saw my pet dog…he looked so cute that he seldom had to ask forgiveness, no matter what he did. “From sms to tweets, when everything in life is becoming simple, short & sweet, why not the procedure of forgiveness?”I thought.

The answer lay in something my mom in law says quite frequently (though in different contexts)…”one should give only what s/he is ready to take.” When it comes to taking, we want the big & the best. We love being pampered & showered with numerous apologies so that we can finally give forgiveness as recognition of several tough efforts the seeker has made. What happens when roles are reversed? The same us who love being apologized to, take to self pity & look for easy options that would save us the effort. When mistakes are ours, then apologies are ours too.

An honest confession…

Despite penning down this overdose of gyaan, my heart tempts to install a light system (similar to the ones third umpires use) in my house. The seeker could write the apology in not more than 50 words (only written communication allowed). Till the time, there’s no light showing result, there would be high decibels of continuous “I am sorry” enough to bug/deafen the giver; the red light would have a permanent dysfunction so that just like Hindi movies, there would always be a happy ending!

To the readers, who stopped reading midway, or got bugged by this boring post, my sincere apologies. Happens with me too, but sometimes, it is better to write it out!

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Song review – Lat Lag Gayee (Race II)

Mr hubby & I are poles apart in our choice of movie songs. I am a retro while he is a metro & loves to try out new things. I feel like an antique piece when hubby & niece discuss the latest songs. But that’s the beauty of being married. The best of both come together & we are an amazing Antakshari team.

Few days ago, he called me up & was humming this song in some ‘”Uh uh uh aaaa yey” I was like “you fine?” He then said it was the latest hottest number from Race 2. He usually updates the old fashioned me however he was all praises for Jaqueline Fernandes. As the wife in me fumed inside, I hid the smoke & lovingly said “Sure baby, will check it out”.

I must admit I usually think all men just like women with less clothes & probably that’s why he was all praises for Jaqualine. But one look at the song & it proved me wrong. The lady is doing all she can to make her mark in Bollywood & the efforts do show. Here’s the song...

It’s the first time that I looked at a song &  noticed the girl more than the guy. Hey! Before u jump on to conclusions, I’m perfectly norrrmal. But look at Saif in the song. He doesn't look normal. He needs some lessons from his new begum on looking young (he can try by throwing that cigarette) and  being more stylish. Once look at the song & he is looking the oldest odd one out in the entire cast. Mr. Casting Director, poor Jackie is making so much efforts to brighten up, at least do justice to her by casting some young actor! I know u compensated for Saif’s fee by cost cutting in Jackie’s clothes. But I just loved her green mini skirt & the overall look.

Overall, the song is a treat & I couldn't help but tap my feet to the amazing techno beats. Shalmali Kholgale has done full justice with her attitude waala voice & has proven her versatility after songs like Pareshaan (Ishaqzade). Full marks to the choreographer for getting the steps right with Jackie, specially the finger on the lips step which caught immediate attention of Mr. Hubby. However, Saif could have done more than just jumping on the fragile dance floor (thump, thump, thump!) & his same old blank face, trying to give the same old macho looks.

4 on 5 from me for the song. The one point has been deducted due to the Chhote Nawab, else everything is flawless.  Maybe its time Saif focuses more on pleasing his Begum than romancing actresses who look much younger than him…

Ek Chhoti Si Hate Story

This blog received a Wow mention @ Blogadda!

Location: Finance lecture

Actors : Mind & heart

Director: But of course, our genius blogger

Background Score: Professor with his fusion of jargons & philosophy

Pic Courtesy: Google Search

Once, the mind and heart were sitting together in a lecture. The mind was trying its best to comprehend and retain the professor’s shower of technical jargons. The heart, on the other hand was greedily looking at the iphone screen on the second bench and the game being played on it.

Heart: I forgot to get my laptop, else I too would have survived the two hour session.

Mind : Shhh! Can’t you see I’m trying hard to concentrate on the lecture? You better not disturb me.

Heart (in a playful mood): Concentrate…ooh as if your rusting neurons & grey matter are as good as that topper sitting on the last bench. Why waste time, when you won’t remember a thing at the sight of the examination paper. No matter how much you try, you never leave your parampara (ritual) of cribbing after every exam. Chill! I have an idea. Let’s try to sleep with eyes wide open!

Mind (infuriated): You wicked heart! How dare you call me inferior? If I don’t cooperate, you will go far from being a good heart to an insane one. Had I not been there, you wouldn't even remember who to love and who to hate. Imagine, what would have been your plight had I created few cross connections here & there.

Heart (with a foul face): Monsieur Heart, just because you do me few favors don’t mean you run the show. Don’t forget, if I leave, nothing survives. Business is all you mean. But at the end of the day, it is I who decide whether the person is happy or sad.

Mind: But I give consciousness, else…

The professor spotted the dilated pupils & immediately popped up a question. Poor mind hastily got its act together & the heart had a hearty, wicked laugh.

Two hours into the lecture, the heart had it enough.

Heart: I am yawning nonstop. Can’t take it anymore. I wanna doze off. Shut up your useless activity & let me rest.

Mind: You think I like all this? It is so tough for me. But what to do. I am the mind. I don’t have the luxury of wanting & desiring like you have. I have to do what is right.

Heart: But we can take a break! You are so tired my dear.

Mind: I am the mind, it’s a horrible life, I can’t rest till the class is on, else I won’t have any inputs even to my subconscious memory…it's technical stuff, you won’t get it. Just stay quiet for another hour & then we can take the desired nap.

Heart: Alright dear, I have no choice, can’t leave you. But I have a condition. Every 5 minutes I want an update on the minutes left for the class to be over, else I will trouble you with my useless nonsense & you can’t even ignore me else I will make you sad.

Mind: You are such a Betaal!

Heart: And u are my darling king Vikramaditya! Hate me, curse me, but u can’t leave me.

Mind: I hate u

Heart: Like I love u

Mind: Okay, all conditions agreed. Now keep quiet for the next hour

Heart (winks): Shhhhhh

The mind took notes religiously for the next one hour while the heart looked here & there and waited for the next time checked.

As the class got over,

Heart (screaming): yippeeee

Mind: Phew! Finally….I am exhausted….who am i? A zombie?

Heart: Hehe

Mind: You must be very sleepy. Sorry. Lets catch up on sleep.

Heart: Now that the class is over, on second thoughts…Neah!  Miss Youtube is waiting for a movie date & I must look my best!

Mind (winks) : Oh!!!!!

Mind & Heart (singing): 

The class ends, the class ends, 

We have become best friends

Lalala!  Lalala!

To see Miss youtube, we cant wait

Lets rush for the movie date!
Lalala! Lalala!

Pic Courtesy: Google Search

This post is a part of <a title="Write Over the Weekend" href="http://blog.blogadda.com/category/write-over-the-weekend-wow" target="_blank">Write Over the Weekend</a>, an initiative for <a title="Reach out to the largest community of Indian Bloggers" href="http://www.blogadda.com/" target="_blank">Indian Bloggers</a> by BlogAdda

Fears...

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I have recently started seeing a surge in people wanting to face their fears. Be it the reality show “fear factor”, increasing number of people going for adventure sports, increasing focus on healing one’s life etc. "Sometimes people like to do things just to do something", I told myself. 

Fears are like the clouds in the sky; the shapes might change but they are never out of sight. How is it possible then to face one’s fears in the eyes specially the ones whose very mention give us goose bumps & that sinking feeling in the tummy?

I was watching a famous Bollywood actress in an interview last night. As she spoke about her constant ventures to overcome her fears, I wondered if it is too good to be true. Do people claim victory over their fears or they are just saying it aloud so that their heart can listen & remember to turn a blind eye to those fears?

I am scared of a freaking lot of things in my life. Instead of bragging about my self-proclaimed triumphs over them, I prefer being honest & accepting my fears. It’s good to be human sometimes & I am definitely one.

However, temptation is very wicked. So last night I had this sudden itch of overcoming my fears. They have been hovering around my grey matter all these years but to write them down & accept that they did exist & trouble me, required some guts. My brown eyes obliged many of them with ample saline water & I just let them be… Also jotted down the things I want to do in life….and I must say the list far far faaaar exceeded the list of fears. I’m a greedy gal!

I donno if this will help but when mere acceptance gave me so much relaxation, I hope the journey will just get better now…I wish myself all the best for this new endeavor!

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You only live once

We all begin our lives like a white board – clean and clear. As we grow up, we dream of making it big. The grind we endure in academic years is to ensure freedom to earn and do whatever we want without having to look up to anyone. Till one day, we are on our own. Own money, own life, freedom that we had always yearned for. “Wow”, we say, “The party has begun”

Our greedy mind wants more, and there are no free lunches in this world. So we work extra, strive to succeed, get that extra share of pie. The days extend into nights and we become so busy with “just getting it right” that we forget why it all began. To be happy! And happiness no money can buy. It comes from within, triggered by the small joys of life.

The grass is greener on the other side. When we are young and have the small joys at our disposal, we ask for bigger, better. And when we get that bigger, better, we realize that the innocent, sweet fruit of happiness lay hidden in those small joys we once had.

As it happens with anybody at the start of his/career, I, in my first job was at my workaholic best. I would stretch to limits that would surprise my bosses, would eat, sleep and think about my job. My office began to see more of me than my family did. I would enter home just in time for dinner and doze off. Then, one day my mother asked me “Why have you decided to work?” “So that I can be independent & do what I want”. I said. “But are you really getting time to do what you really like doing? How many books have you finished in the last 2 months?” That got me thinking. The rut of life was pulling me inside like a whirlpool, and I was not even realizing it. But when you are 20, all that seems right is big, better and beautiful & so I forgot her words the next morning & happily gave in to the busy bee syndrome.

Many years have passed since this dialogue. Mom & I never spoke again about it. Now, she is no more. I am doing well for myself. But when I see myself not getting time to blog, despite my mind bubbling with ideas, I wonder what’s wrong. Everything technically right happens in life, but suddenly you find yourself hard pressed with time for the people you love and the things you love to do…the reason why it all began…and then you wonder….

As I write, I recall the scene from “Rock On” where Farhan Akhtar turns off his system just in time to be with his rock band!

The lesson, I have learnt is that sky is the limit to ambitions. But one should always give priority to the people one loves & the things one enjoys doing. Coz it is what you love that brings happiness inside…and only if you are happy, you can enjoy any luxury money can buy…

Have a similar experience? 

A home is a home is a home

Whenever I read reports in newspapers about disturbance in a country, I wonder why cant the people there shift their base rather than living in fear of death and uncertainty. The world is a much open place now and anyone can go and settle in the place of his choice & live a better life. And my opinion applies to people living in extreme sub zero climates, places with forever political problems, high militancy areas etc etc. However, I am told nobody likes to leave his house…coz home is where the heart is.

Even the pigeons on my hostel window reflect the same attitude. To be honest, I hate being away from home, away from the happening city, in a place everything, right from food to climate to infrastructure is in a state of despair. Yet, everyday I see a bunch of pigeons living happily on my room window. Its no easy situation for them either. The place is not an ideal destination for enough water, or food for them. Still, no matter how much I try to shoo them away, they always come back to the window. They have a free mode of transport, would need no passport/visas to shift to greener pastures & are not even bound by a residential program (like me!)…so what is it that motivates them?

And then I look at migratory birds in Lodi Garden in winter mornings. Like tourists, they come every year, to survive extreme weather conditions. Yet the comfort is unable to make them stay here forever. Come the right season in their home country & they happily take the long flight back home.

They say the solution to life’s puzzles lies in looking inside, so I introspect. No matter how much I love Delhi, there are people who strongly share the opposite opinion – people from other cultures finding tough to adjust here, tourists harassed  by the locals, people finding the city unsafe…they have their own reasons that nobody can counter. Yet, what is it that binds me to the place? Like a migratory bird, I look forward to taking that first flight home whenever I can…because home is where u feel comfortable and secure… home is where the heart is!

Exams are over tomorrow & I head home! 

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